Imagine that you wake up one day with no memories. No recollection of who you are, where you are from nor why you are where you are. Imagine that in order to fit in and survive you move through life with the hopes that one day you will remember everything. You learn about the people around you, the world you live in and about the rules of your culture. You experience love, kindness, happiness and safety; but you also experience hatred, fear, sadness, tragedy, loss, pain and discomfort. Your life is a series of ups followed by downs and the ups never last long enough. The downs challenge you and threaten to dash your hopes of ever arriving at a safe, happy, comfortable place to live out your life. Your memory is still wiped clean of your starting point and you desperately strain to remember.
“Who am I?”
“Where did I come from?”
“Why am I here and how did I get here?”
Depression and despair begin to dominate you. You are constantly striving to find that peaceful, love-filled, safe place. Just when you think you have found this place, it is destroyed. You have believed up until now that if you followed all the rules, lived life as a “good person”, stayed healthy, loved as much as you could, trusted and forgave that you would be protected from the bad things in life. You would avoid pain, loss, betrayal, disease and fear. You would be kept safe and you would be loved and cared for. However, that isn’t how it has played out. You feel duped and lied to. You feel angry at the world and realize that you are the only person you can trust and there is no safe place or person. And then you ask yourself, “Well then what the hell is the point of all this”?
Now imagine that in your deepest despair, you find a video with your name on it. When you play it, this is what you see:
A young, vibrant, beautiful, glowing You is standing before a bright light. It is the You a long time before you lost your memory. You seem to be in front of a group of people that you cannot see but they are explaining something to You. They are describing an important mission; a journey. The You in the video is eager and listens intently on what they say.
“This mission will challenge you to your very core and shake your belief and confidence in all that is good. You will question God and you will question yourself. You will experience difficult feelings that you have never felt such as sadness, fear, despair, depression and pain. The people around you will seem confused, lost, angry, instinctual and primal compared to what you are used to now. But remember that like you, they are amnesia induced souls that accepted a similar mission. Each of their journeys are for different purposes, so honor their journey and honor your own. The purpose of your mission to this foreign place is to first forget Yourself and then to find again the loving, peace-filled God-like being that You are. All of this happening while being immersed in a primal backwards body and a primal backwards world. You will not remember anything about who you really are. You will only remember an inkling of the love you feel here and the support from all of us as we walk with you on your journey. When you arrive in this foreign place you will longingly strive to find the peace and love and safety that your heart remembers. You will find blips and spurts of it, but it will be fleeting because your new environment cannot support that kind of place. It is not what that environment is for. Most of your life will be filled with hardship, pain, challenges and tragedy. You will experience the worst that humanity can give you. You will experience abandonment, hatred, abuse, disease and betrayal. And many of these experiences will come from the people that you love the most. You will feel abandoned by God and by us but it is an illusion, for God is with you and we are with you and always will be. As you survive through your pain and struggles you will make choices that determine where you go next. You can choose anger, resentment and withdrawal. You can choose acceptance, forgiveness and love. Your choices will either revive or bury the memories of who you are. It is only through these choices that you will truly remember. This journey is difficult and only taken on by the brave because it requires pain to activate your awakening. With each new trial you have the choice again and with each choice you will remember more or bury more. You will be confused as to why you continue to have painful experiences…but try to understand this now…it is only through pain that this transformation can happen and it is the experience of pain that allows you to connect with the experiences of the rest of that world. For after you have remembered the beautiful being that you are, it will be your secondary purpose to help others to remember who they are. Do you understand what you are agreeing to do?”
You watch as the glowing You smiles confidently and bravely and says, “I do. I know it will be hard but I also know that I can do this. I understand the growth that this experience will give to my soul and I am going to rock that human experience! I’m ready. Bring it on!”
The video is over.
The second movie I’d like to recommend from our Film Festival experience is:
It is about two people who have experienced trauma and tragedy in their life. It’s about their coming together to bring healing to each other when and only when the other was ready for that healing. Tim Robbins stars in it and it moved me deeply. I hope you are equally as moved.